Selfishness vs Selflessness

[Kath]

Still, I’ll maintain that it’s a damn good woman that is willing to admit some fault, and stick it out.

Seriously. Fuck you and your new-found misogyny.

[SuburbanFarmer]

Still, I’ll maintain that it’s a damn good woman that is willing to admit some fault, and stick it out.

Seriously. Fuck you and your new-found misogyny.

Cheating doesn’t happen in a vacuum. We all know DrY isn’t some lecherous fool of low character. And established marriages don’t fall apart because of one party.

I’m sure there’s something on both sides to be regretted, and the fact that she’s willing to admit that speaks volumes for her character. I’m just impressed with the mans wife. Not blaming her for whatever happened.

Nobody gets a blank check in this life. Faultless victims are a very rare thing, in the first world.

[DBTrek]

Faultless victims are a very rare thing, in the first world.

Unless they’re multiple offenders assaulting cops on the beach, of course.
Pfffft.

Can’t even get one day of consistency out of this guy.

[Speaker to Animals]

It's usually the case that both people contributed somehow to a dysfunction in a relationship.

That responsibility does not somehow translate into responsibility for the other person cheating. Seriously unpack what you implied here. "You made me cheat because you didn't make this relationship more enjoyable for me." I have been on the receiving end of that. People who think that way need some kind of universal mark on their record as fair warning.

We are all responsible for our own actions over which we possess agency. We are not responsible for other people's bad choices.

[DBTrek]

This of course, ignores the simple truism that leftist ideology is completely based on people *not* having agency, but rather being trapped in some simplistic oppressor/oppressed model that can be applied to every human situation.

So as correct and obvious as “people are responsible for their own actions” sounds, remember half the population is invested in dismissing that concept entirely.
/shrug

[SuburbanFarmer]

It's usually the case that both people contributed somehow to a dysfunction in a relationship.

That responsibility does not somehow translate into responsibility for the other person cheating. Seriously unpack what you implied here. "You made me cheat because you didn't make this relationship more enjoyable for me." I have been on the receiving end of that. People who think that way need some kind of universal mark on their record as fair warning.

We are all responsible for our own actions over which we possess agency. We are not responsible for other people's bad choices.

Neither extreme is a useful conclusion. I’m not arguing that it’s her “fault”.

I’ve been on the receiving and giving end of that mess, and neither side was ever blameless. I was unable to admit fault at the time, and I admire someone who is.

[DBTrek]

The non-cheating side is blameless for the cheating side cheating.
It ain’t rocket science.
The cheater may have reasons for the decision to cheat, maybe even reasons involving actions of the non-cheater, but they were never forced by the non-cheaters to act upon those reasons. Why is this a struggle for you?

[SuburbanFarmer]

The non-cheating side is blameless for the cheating side cheating.
It ain’t rocket science.
The cheater may have reasons for the decision to cheat, maybe even reasons involving actions of the non-cheater, but they were never forced by the non-cheaters to act upon those reasons. Why is this a struggle for you?

I have no struggle. Somehow, several of you are struggling to see shades of gray, as always.

[DBTrek]

Ah, I see - personal decisions are a “shade of gray”, and it’s not easy assigning responsibility for them.

Leftists.

[SuburbanFarmer]

Ah, I see - personal decisions are a “shade of gray”, and it’s not easy assigning responsibility for them.

Leftists.

All choices are assumed to be fully informed and made without influence.

Neocons.