Good Dancer

[Martin Hash]

My wife, Gwynne, and I go dancing to live music three times a week at different places. People know us, even players in the bands. I have a good time out on the floor, especially after a few whiskeys and a couple beers, which is the secret of my dancing success. Unfortunately, a couple weeks ago, somewhere between 4 and 5 shots, while spinning around on my right foot, when I replanted my left, it rolled to the outside and I went down. It hurt but not enough I couldn’t finish the dance before going home. However, I was suspicious of the crunching sound when I walked, and when I woke up the next morning and my foot was swollen up like a watermelon, I knew something in there was definitely broke, probably more than one of the little bones inside. Gwynne didn't seem too concerned.
“Did you put your shirt & socks in the wash?” she asked.
“Yes.”
“Did you put your shoes outside?”
“Yes.”
“Did you take a shower?”
“I’m all dried off now.”
“Take a shower,” Gwynne insisted. “And put those pants in the wash too.”
My son, Heath, came over to bring an old immobility boot he used to wear when he broke his foot snowboarding.

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“You take break dancing too literally,” he told me. “Maybe you should take it easy.”
“Mom says she won’t slow dance with me after my shirt is wet, but how many guys my age can do all of Kevin Bacon’s part in Footloose, most of Billie Jean, and a full back bend during Louie, Louie?” I challenged.
“There’s a reason for that,” Gwynne answered enigmatically.
“They're probably jealous?” I suggested.
Gwynne looked at me with half-closed eyes, “ I don’t think that’s it,” she replied.
Just then, my daughter, Heather, came in to see how I was.
“Heather went with us last night,” I told Heath.
“Was Dad dancing?” Heath asked her.
“Oh, yeah,” Heather replied dramatically.
“Hey,” I said. “Heather was dancing too.”
“Was she?” Heath replied. “What about Mom; was she dancing?”
“Yes.”
“Did they bump into anybody or knock anything over? Did they break any bones?”
“I was spinning on one foot,” I defended myself. “And people often comment on my dancing,” I told him.
“I bet they do. What do they say?”
“They say he’s 'enthusiastic,'” Gwynne replied. “And 'uninhibited.'”
I heard someone say he was ‘unique' and 'energetic,'” Heather added.
“And 'interpretive,'” Gwynne continued.
“I’m a good dancer,” I said, defensively.
Both Heath & Heather remained mute.
I looked at Gwynne for support.
“You’re a good dancer, honey,” she said, smiling.
“See,” I told the kids, triumphantly. “Mom said so.”

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[Smitty-48]

Martin Dressed for Dancing s.jpg

"You can never be too rich or too thin" ~ Wallis Simpson