Daralon Bare-Knuckle No-Holds-Barred Challenge MMA MHF Contest

[heydaralon]

I got raped yesterday. And today. I mean literally. I spent close to $1500 dollars on insurance, a new tire, and an oil change. My asshole is still sore and I'm getting over jock itch so who knows what sort of STD's I picked up from my insurance provider. I am losing money worse than Lehman Brothers, and now its time to put my martial art skills to good use.

I will make this short and sweet. I will fight anyone on this forum. I'm that angry. If you all have a problem with me or my posts we can settle this in the ring. Here's the deal: come down to Florida, and throw some fists if you think that I'm out of line.

The Rules:

1. The fight is over when I say it is over. That could mean 80 rounds. Or it could mean before the first one. I'm not trying to say that I'd cancel a fight before it started (I definitely wouldn't) but I have a busy work schedule and if I get called into work right before the fight, I would have to cancel it. I am a very skilled fighter, so if that happened (it wouldn't) then just imagine that you got humiliated and savagely beaten in the fight, because that is what would have happened if I had actually fought you

2. There is a one-time-only non-refundable $2000 payment that must be made to me at least 24 hours before the fight takes place. This is to cover my medical bills in the off chance that you cheat and land some cheap shots. In a fair fight, I would beat everyone on this forum, including Speaker, Kath, Fife, Penner, Hwen, C-Mag, Clubgop, and MilSpecs, but I need to cover my bases and make sure that I can get myself patched up if someone tries to color outside the lines and behave in a immoral below the belt way. Again, if the fight gets cancelled for work reasons then the deposit will not be repaid.

3. You have to pay for your own airfare down to FL. The deposit does not cover that. Don't come crying to me that holiday plane tickets are so damn expensive. Not my problem. You wanted to fight me. I didn't make a thread online about wanting to fight. You did. Accept the consequences.

4. I am 5'6''. If you are taller than me, there is an extra $500 fee if you want to get in the ring with me. Again, I won't cancel a fight because I'm scared, but if I get called into work right when the fight is supposed to happen, then I will have to work my shift and we won't be able to brawl. The $500, just like the above sum isn't refundable. If you are angry about that, then just deposit another $2K and we can fight again, assuming I don't get called into work at that time. To be on the safe side, just deposit $2000 more than once on two separate dates in case I work on one of the fight dates. Again, this is just to be safe in case I have to be at work.

I know this forum is filled with cowards who are probably shitting their pants after reading this, and if you are too scared to get down then I understand. But defeating a heavy-hitter on MHF would do wonders in boosting your credibility and upping your respect, not least of all by me. I've put all my cards on the table. Its time for a worthy online challenger to ante up. I'm waiting.

[TheReal_ND]

How the fuck did you spend 1.3k on insurance?

[heydaralon]

How the fuck did you spend 1.3k on insurance?

If you have a problem about my insurance payment, then fight me. Oh that's right, you are one of those one-world politically correct inter-racial marriage guys. Typical.

[TheReal_ND]

Did you buy a Bentley? Jesus christ just dont pay those fags and go to a brick and mortar fly by night insurance company.

[heydaralon]

Did you buy a Bentley? Jesus christ just dont pay those fags and go to a brick and mortar fly by night insurance company.

Good insurance is expensive in this state, and I got a good plan (afaik) to cover the damage if some retard w/o insurance or a license decides to tbone me again. The next person that does that, I am going to sue them. I don't care if they don't have a pot to piss in right now. If they win the lotto or their parents die and leave them two fucking nickels to rub together, I'm taking it.

[TheReal_ND]

Just get a truck with steel bumpers and dont get tboned. Some niggerian just rear ended me the other day and destroyed his car. He scratched my bumper and I was like "look what you did you dumb faggot let me see your insurance and drivers license." I took a picture and drove off. His car was in shambles but anyway, I am like 99% sure that ID was fake as shit. I've never seen an ID of that age completely wear the mag strip off the back and it felt thin af. Fuck that guy and fuck his stupid little Toyota Corolla.

[heydaralon]

Let me raise the stakes a bit.

If you defeat me in a fight, I will personally recommend you on my linkedin page AND make sure to link your MartinHash.com user profile on my signature to ensure that everyone who subscribes to my posts can see your account. Expect your online followership to triple at least. I'm being modest. You could get a five-fold increase. Don't get excited. You still have to win that fight for me to do any kind of free advertising for you. IF that doesn't cause one of you folks to man up and accept my physical brawl challenge I just don't know what will...

[TheReal_ND]

I have fought people for far less.....

[SuburbanFarmer]

:cracks his knuckles: