Peeing on the Sidewalk

[Martin Hash]

Some people use nuclear weapons, others cite GNP, and most people claim that a country has achieved First World status when no one rides a donkey cart on the side of the road, but I have a different yardstick. My judgment is that if the citizens of a country still use their finger to wipe their ass, put shit-stained toilet paper in a basket, or pisses on a busy sidewalk, they aren't ready to join the modern world. I'm okay if they don't use a toilet but instead squat over a hole to do their business, but there needs to be an abundance of toilet paper and a lack of flies. By this definition, sorry China but you've still got a ways to go.

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In Chengdu, one of China's big tourist cities because of the pandas, shopping districts, and albino yaks, a busy McDonald's had only one squaty with a basket next to it full of used toilet paper and none other. At least the basket gave me something to pick through to find a relatively clean piece to wipe my own ass. And worse, whenever some young child complains to mommy that they've got to wee-wee, mom just pulls down their pants and the kid lets it go right on the sidewalk. No one seems to care, they just walk around the mess. Mostly it's just water but occasionally there are trails of feces footprints on the sidewalk and I don't see any dogs. Luckily the aromas of China masks the sewer smell.

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