The Mess

[Smitty-48]

Mess steward, that's fighting talk, I'm no waiter. You will find me in the kitchen spitting in your beef Wellington.

Bloody unsporting, that, filthy person.

[Montegriffo]

I suspect fisticuffs would be unsporting too. Even if I got a sucker punch in it would probably hurt my fist more than it did your face. You are correct though so on reflection I will take the beating in order to gain your respect.

[Smitty-48]

No, fisticuffs are sporting, but seems a silly reason to take a beating, and I'd have no respect for that, as that's just going from a filthy person to a silly person.

[Montegriffo]

In that case I shall take my revenge on your slur by referring to you as a damn Yankee from now on then.

[Smitty-48]

A slur which has no truth to it, does not sting, everyone knows I am of the confederacy that won the war and lived to tell the tale, Deo vindice.

I'm not one of these Canadians that would take offence for being mistaken for a Yank, God save the Queen, God bless America, I say. My grandparents were American, my father was raised in America from the age of ten to college graduation, quite frankly, I'm more British than the British, and more American than the Americans, both, I am of a British America, and an American Britain, which simply does not exist anymore, a Hanoverian amongst the Hurons, an American Loyalist of yore, but that of course would mean, not a Yankee at all, quite the opposite in fact.

[Montegriffo]

One Northern Irish, One Gibraltan and two English grandparents makes me 100% British. So long as you don't call me Welsh we are ok.

[Smitty-48]

One Northern Irish, One Gibraltan and two English grandparents makes me 100% British. So long as you don't call me Welsh we are ok.

Big whoop, you could be all four grandparents from Papua New Guinea, or Kingston Jamaica, and still be 100% British.

Canada is a place not a race, British is a system of governance, not an ethnicity.

[Montegriffo]

Born and bred in the Motherland. Not some frozen waste land on the wrong side of the Atlantic. Checkmate.

[StCapps]

Born and bred in the Motherland. Not some frozen waste land on the wrong side of the Atlantic. Checkmate.

Funny that "frozen wasteland" is actually the best real-estate in the British Commonwealth. You're just jealous, trapped on a little rainy island while lashing out at those living in luxury in the land of red and green maples.

[Montegriffo]

Second driest county in the UK. Not a lot of rain in Norfolk. You must be confusing me with Wales.
Everybody knows England is God's own country.