What if the forum was a D&D campaign?

[DrYouth]

[rolls dice]

Epic shot...

You catch the fleeing Lizard man through the throat...

[rolls dice]

The larger Lizard man has recovered from the piss attack.

He attacks from the bushes.

[roll dice]

You are caught off balance...

His sword lands for 4hp, and he follows this with a vicious 6hp bite...

[TheReal_ND]

Destroy this lizard man.

[DrYouth]

[rolls dice]

You manage to unsheath your sword and catch him in the thigh, you follow this with a slash from your dagger across his forearm

[rolls dice]

He's enraged and lunges at you, but you spin and dodge his attacks...

[rolls dice]

He's off balance now and you land a sword in his guts and finish him with a dagger to the throat...

The lizard man crumples to the ground as you wipe his blood from your face.

The camp lies before you... the silence broken only by the sound of crickets as dusk approaches.

[TheReal_ND]

Now the lizard men have tasted the wrath of my piss. I shall dispatch them one by one with a final severing blow and drag their corpses near the fire to be butchered one by one and put on spits. This is my camp now. But first, I will dance the dance of my people.

[DrYouth]

As night falls the fire burns and the smell of roasting lizard flesh fills the air.

The owls and night creatures watch the mesmerizing dance of the manic ranger...

intoxicated with victory, his own piss and a keg of ale he has found in the camp.

[SuburbanFarmer]

[DrYouth]

And into our midsts strides Cappy...

Now a Paladin of Liberty!

He has declared Holy War against Kath for her actions of censorship in the tavern.

Apparently she bounced Clubby out of the tavern for flashing Monte... an act of censorship most are grateful for.
And threatened Cappy after going from table to table talking about some obscure Northern game.

He claims he gained a +5 Holy Sword on a quest... but rumour has it, it is actually a cursed -1 sword of false confidence.

[clubgop]

And into our midsts strides Cappy...

Now a Paladin of Liberty!

He has declared Holy War against Kath for her actions of censorship in the tavern.

Apparently she bounced Clubby out of the tavern for flashing Monte... an act of censorship most are grateful for.
And threatened Cappy after going from table to table talking about some obscure Northern game.

He claims he gained a +5 Holy Sword on a quest... but rumour has it, it is actually a cursed -1 sword of false confidence.

Not analogous, more like accusing him of poisoning the ale because he had to drag a certain Mercurial official marked with the sunburst into all the stories of the parties exploits. Most think it is a step too far because ale is far more precious than children and knowing of my experience with alchemy it would be I that would poison something.

[DrYouth]

Not analogous, more like accusing him of poisoning the ale because he had to drag a certain Mercurial official marked with the sunburst into all the stories of the parties exploits. Most think it is a step too far because ale is far more precious than children and knowing of my experience with alchemy it would be I that would poison something.

Clubgop, apparently very intoxicated, climbs upon a soapbox in the square, ranting incoherently about a Mercurial official marked with a sunburst... the rest of the party retires to the tavern to talk chickens, fucking and kittens... as is the custom in the land.

[DBTrek]

This land sux.
Me and the pirate ship are off to GreyHawk.