Protecting the Free-Range Kid

[SuburbanFarmer]

Opposite for me, My father was very strict. I lived in fear of him a lot of the time and rushed around the house tidying up when I heard the distinctive sound of his car coming.

+1
Daddy's home, everybody run!

Not a physical fear, but if the house was a mess we were in trouble.

I know what you're talking about, and I don't roll that way. I bitch about the mess, and kick it around a bit, but I don't impose military law until bedtime.

[Montegriffo]

Time I was about 14 or 15 I had dinner on the table by the time Dad got home, sister and I both chose to stay with Dad after the divorce.

[SuburbanFarmer]

Time I was about 14 or 15 I had dinner on the table by the time Dad got home, sister and I both chose to stay with Dad after the divorce.

Funny how that works, right?

[Montegriffo]

Funny thing was Mum had to pay alimony to Dad.

[SuburbanFarmer]

Funny thing was Mum had to pay alimony to Dad.

Definitely didn't happen in America then.

[Montegriffo]

Funny thing was Mum had to pay alimony to Dad.

Definitely didn't happen in America then.

Probably rare here too but Mum's new husband was rich so when she appealed the courts decision that Dad had to pay her one pound per week the courts decided she had to pay towards the costs of bringing up two kids instead. Dad kept the family home and didn't have to give Mum her half till I finished school.

[Okeefenokee]

In sum, I needed the hammer.

I would get it soon enough, in massive massive doses.

I know what you mean. The real world does NOT pull any punches. If you're not prepared to buckle down, you just get run over and beat until you figure it out.

This dovetails into the school thread.

Life has gotten a lot easier. A hundred years ago, you wouldn't have needed to have life smack you around in your twenties. Your entire life leading up to your twenties was one ass kicking after another.

I know the sun isn't out yet, but if you want breakfast you're gonna have to go get it. Feed and water the chickens, pigs, horses, and cows, then you can eat. You wanna freeze to death this winter? Well, if not you'll be spending your cozy summer vacation felling and splitting fire wood, and it's all hand tools. Wanna go to town? Well, the rich guy in town has one of them fancy new cars, but you're gonna spend the next hour getting the horses hitched. Oh yeah, the horses. You ever picked up dog shit? Well, it's like that, but the dog is two thousand pounds and you're using a shovel.

In the winter, when the sun goes down at five, that's when you go to bed. Lamp oil and candles are too expensive to burn all night just to read. You're gonna lay down in bed, in silence, aching from the day's work, and know that it's all coming back around in the morning. You're gonna get up again and tend to all the animals, and then walk your ass all the way to school, and if you're smart you'll understand that school's your ticket.

Today, most people don't learn that until long after they should have.

[MilSpecs]

Not a physical fear, but if the house was a mess we were in trouble.

It was common to be beaten in my original neighborhood, through the generations. It was seen as 'good parenting.' People made jokes about it when they got older and told 'the worst beating I ever got' stories (which I would rip my tongue out before I ever told my kids). My generation was the one that broke the cycle.

[Smitty-48]

Me ol' pappy never laid a glove on me, till one day I flipped him the bird right up in his grill, then he grabbed me by the lapels, to which I answered with an uppercut, then all heck broke loose... by the end of the day, I was on my way to boot camp.

[Montegriffo]

Not a physical fear, but if the house was a mess we were in trouble.

It was common to be beaten in my original neighborhood, through the generations. It was seen as 'good parenting.' People made jokes about it when they got older and told 'the worst beating I ever got' stories (which I would rip my tongue out before I ever told my kids). My generation was the one that broke the cycle.

Dad's Dad was born before WWI and would have had a Victorian upbringing, he joined the Army at 16 and spent his whole life as a soldier. My Dad would have had a very strict military style upbringing so really I got it light compared to him. A slap on the leg was as much of a beating I ever got and I always got an apology and an explanation afterwards.