Martin Hash wrote: Thu Mar 28, 2019 9:54 am
You should see me in action.
Double entendres aside.
How good are you at remembering the details of other people’s personal lives? That’s always remarkable in high social achievers. A friend of mine could go somewhere and remember the smallest details about everyone she’d already met, even if it had been a long time ago. And she also had the ability to make everyone feel like they were her good friend, as though they understood each other deeply. They have friends everywhere too. My dad could visit a town once and years later people would still contact him.
MilSpecs wrote: Thu Mar 28, 2019 9:49 am
There’s also social achievement. Like athletic or musical ability, it’s mostly something you’re born with and it can be used to achieve a lot more. Everyone knows somebody who possesses it. They’re the people who everyone knows; the natural center of attention in any group of people. The skills are learned but they’re born with the charisma. I’ve seen it in action in politicians and it’s truly remarkable.
I recently started rewatching Halt and Catch Fire with my family that didn't see it. Lee Pace's Jobs-like "visionary" character in there is someone like you describe. We talked about it after a recent episode, how folks like that are like people hackers, they know how to push buttons to get responses. 30 years ago the hot term for this was Neurolinguistic Programming. A good part of it is also reading people. As a poor "people skills" guy this stuff has always fascinated me. It could almost be viewed as parasitic, getting others to do what you want done.
My dad was a salesman with an amazing memory for faces. He could walk down the street in Manhattan and spot someone he went to high school with 40 years earlier. I'll walk past someone I worked with a few months earlier. It's like a learning disability!
We are only accustomed to dealing with like twenty online personas at a time so when we only have about ten people some people have to be strawmanned in order to advance our same relative go nowhere nonsense positions. -TheReal_ND
Martin Hash wrote: Thu Mar 28, 2019 9:54 am
You should see me in action.
Double entendres aside.
How good are you at remembering the details of other people’s personal lives? That’s always remarkable in high social achievers. A friend of mine could go somewhere and remember the smallest details about everyone she’d already met, even if it had been a long time ago. And she also had the ability to make everyone feel like they were her good friend, as though they understood each other deeply. They have friends everywhere too. My dad could visit a town once and years later people would still contact him.
MilSpecs wrote: Thu Mar 28, 2019 9:49 am
There’s also social achievement. Like athletic or musical ability, it’s mostly something you’re born with and it can be used to achieve a lot more. Everyone knows somebody who possesses it. They’re the people who everyone knows; the natural center of attention in any group of people. The skills are learned but they’re born with the charisma. I’ve seen it in action in politicians and it’s truly remarkable.
I recently started rewatching Halt and Catch Fire with my family that didn't see it. Lee Pace's Jobs-like "visionary" character in there is someone like you describe. We talked about it after a recent episode, how folks like that are like people hackers, they know how to push buttons to get responses. 30 years ago the hot term for this was Neurolinguistic Programming. A good part of it is also reading people. As a poor "people skills" guy this stuff has always fascinated me. It could almost be viewed as parasitic, getting others to do what you want done.
That’s it exactly. They are true extroverts, living off the energy of others.
It’s actually difficult to run into people who knew my dad. They wax enthusiastic about their good friend, when the reality is that they were just the audience for another great performance. I never let on though. Let them have good memories of a special person.
Martin Hash wrote: Thu Mar 28, 2019 9:54 am
You should see me in action.
Double entendres aside.
How good are you at remembering the details of other people’s personal lives? That’s always remarkable in high social achievers. A friend of mine could go somewhere and remember the smallest details about everyone she’d already met, even if it had been a long time ago. And she also had the ability to make everyone feel like they were her good friend, as though they understood each other deeply. They have friends everywhere too. My dad could visit a town once and years later people would still contact him.
MilSpecs wrote: Thu Mar 28, 2019 9:49 am
There’s also social achievement. Like athletic or musical ability, it’s mostly something you’re born with and it can be used to achieve a lot more. Everyone knows somebody who possesses it. They’re the people who everyone knows; the natural center of attention in any group of people. The skills are learned but they’re born with the charisma. I’ve seen it in action in politicians and it’s truly remarkable.
I recently started rewatching Halt and Catch Fire with my family that didn't see it. Lee Pace's Jobs-like "visionary" character in there is someone like you describe. We talked about it after a recent episode, how folks like that are like people hackers, they know how to push buttons to get responses. 30 years ago the hot term for this was Neurolinguistic Programming. A good part of it is also reading people. As a poor "people skills" guy this stuff has always fascinated me. It could almost be viewed as parasitic, getting others to do what you want done.
That’s it exactly. They are true extroverts, living off the energy of others.
It’s actually difficult to run into people who knew my dad. They wax enthusiastic about their good friend, when the reality is that they were just the audience for another great performance. I never let on though. Let them have good memories of a special person.
My dad (a salesman) is just like this. I always tell my wife who’s a social butterfly (but sincere) that even though she really enjoys gatherings, I’m exhausted after performing all night.
p.s. We’re hosting some couples at our house tonight (and every Thursday) for Black Glass wine-tasting. The alcohol makes it bearable.
