Protecting the Free-Range Kid

[Okeefenokee]

but there are no young ladies in the barracks, or at least, there weren't back then

Plenty of tail in the barracks now. Best not to mess with it, though.

I stayed away from army women, not because there weren't any hotties, but spending a night in the arms of a young lady, was a rejuvenating escape from the army, last thing I wanted to do on a date, was talk army, dance army, then fuck army, that would have been army overload, on a date with a young lady, I wanted to be as far away from army as I could, just to keep things in balance.

I was the same way. Told my soldiers to stay away from them. Somewhere along the way I ended up with one.

[Smitty-48]

Well, if you're going to marry a woman, that's different, although, I wouldn't have wanted to have my wife in the chain of command with me, that would have been too weird, my wife is a princess girly girl, about as un-army as you can get, and that's how I like it.

[Speaker to Animals]

So you guys never had the barracks wife experience?

[Smitty-48]

When I first started dating my steady girlfriend back then, she was only 18, she didn't exaclty want to hang out with her parents around, so when the battalion went on Christmas leave, the barracks was basically empty, so I didn't bother to go home on leave, and she came over and stayed in my room, and pretty much all we did was fuck like rabbits, but once the leave was over, then we started going to her parents house, that's the closest I've been to a barracks wife methinks, but when the battalion is in residence, the barracks is no place for a young lady of quality.

Actually dating army women? No, I liked my girls seprerate from my army, and my army seperate from my girls.

There's also the bliss in the army, of just not having any squaws around, I would keep my bivouac a sausage fest, as much as I would keep the sausage fest away from my dates. Sometimes you just want to be the men's team, but who wants the men's team around spectating, when you're balls deep in somebodies lovely daughter?

[Okeefenokee]

I had a room inspection once when my girlfriend was still asleep in my bed. That was a no no. The Sergeant that checked my room saw that everything was squared away, dress right dress, and didn't care about the girl. As I was leaving, Sergeant Major was on the prowl doing his own checks, saw me, pointed at me, and said, "YOU!" I slammed the door, grabbed her out of bed, and threw her out the window. Word had reached the platoon, and the NCOs quickly got her out of there. Somehow, she didn't break up with me over that one.

[Smitty-48]

Room inspection? Yeah, that wouldn't go over well, we actually got a lot of warning over a room inspection coming down with plenty of time to get squared away, kind of an event across the whole battalion at once, was more about getting the place gleaming than it was about jacking us up.

My girlfriend did however infiltrate the lines and sneak up to my room in raincoat over bra and panties, when I was on confinement, which was risky as all hell, but I didn't complain, my buddy across the hall was standing by to hide her, if the duty Sergeant showed up to roust me, but mostly the duty Sergeants just did defaulters up to 2300, then slept through the night.

[TheReal_ND]

When I was in military school we would get warnings for room inspections usually. First thing we'd do is wipe the top surface of the doorsill and mirror and shit. They would put on dress gloves and wipe their finger over them lol. We had this theory where if we sprayed lemon pledge all around the doorframe the inspector would walk in thinking the place smelled fresh and let his guard down.

[Smitty-48]

When I was in military school...

[Okeefenokee]

Room inspection? Yeah, that wouldn't go over well, we actually got a lot of warning over a room inspection coming down with plenty of time to get squared away, kind of an event across the whole battalion at once, was more about getting the place gleaming than it was about jacking us up.

My girlfriend did however infiltrate the lines and sneak up to my room in raincoat over bra and panties, when I was on confinement, which was risky as all hell, but I didn't complain, my buddy across the hall was standing by to hide her, if the duty Sergeant showed up to roust me, but mostly the duty Sergeants just did defaulters up to 2300, then slept through the night.

That was a daily event. Corporals would be crawling through the barracks every morning to check and see if we were leaving our rooms assed up before PT. I could understand it. My digs were nicer than anything I'd ever lived in my life. Had no problem keeping them in order.

Had one dirty fuck that justified it. On one inspection, they found a pepperoni stuck to his ceiling. Once in Iraq, he was using a laundry bag as a pillow. Woke up one night, puked in it, and went back to sleep. It was the smell that got the other soldiers to call for action, and when the NCOs found his days old bag of dirty laundry and puke on his bunk, shit went nuclear.

Bunch of dirty fucks in the Army who always had Mama to wash their shit. Having my squared away room checked because of them only meant I had a daily opportunity to demonstrate I wasn't a dirty fuck.

It's easy to soar like an eagle when you're flying with turkeys. That never failed me.

[Okeefenokee]

When I was in military school we would get warnings for room inspections usually. First thing we'd do is wipe the top surface of the doorsill and mirror and shit. They would put on dress gloves and wipe their finger over them lol. We had this theory where if we sprayed lemon pledge all around the doorframe the inspector would walk in thinking the place smelled fresh and let his guard down.

No shit. If it smells clean, it is clean. This shit ain't hard.