Penner wrote:heydaralon wrote:Penner wrote:
In my opinion, you should've went with the human rogue. Good at sneaking around, decent charisma, decent IQ, can wield just about any weapons, and can pick locks.
Way to dodge the subject Penner. Why not just put it out in the open? I don't masturbate, and that's more than I can say about you. Stop talking about it. I play dungeons and dragons, but that doesn't mean my mind has gross thoughts. If you have a problem with me in the future, just say so.
Are you a gnome folk?
Probably not, because I thought this thread was about Stratego. If that game was life, I would be a miner (piece on the board that is ranked 5). Miners are quite similar to the Dwarves like Gimli in Lord of the Rings. Dwarves are short in stature (like me, I am 5'5'') and thus they resemble gnomes. You are right, but its not due to any sort of superior reasoning. You got lucky, and I'm not going to reward that sort of guesswork. In the future, please read the Hasbro guidelines, copyright, and game instructions before posting, so that we can have a reasonable and honest discussion about Stratego related topics. It is very important that you understand why Spies in that game can only kill Generals and are not the be all end all the way lazy and ignorant people attempt to play. By the way, 5'5'' is not really anything to be ashamed about. A lot of charismatic, handsome, and muscular guys are even shorter than that, and if you take into account the
global average of 5'7'', I am not really short at all. Again, many guys who are tall do not have a personality to speak of, and are complete douchebags. I wouldn't even take for granted that they are gifted Stratego players. In fact, many of these pieces of shit probably think Parker Brothers are a dinner roll company. Board games are something that affects every facet of American life, and people who do not understand this are too stupid to be allowed access to a ballot or driver's license. Try telling girls in the club about your strategy of putting the Stratego flag in your front row, behind the lake barrier. They will give me a blank confused look, and then go talk to some douchey gel'd up sunglass wearing club tool. I am getting quite tired of trying to make small talk with these club diva hoodrats, and I don't feel as though competing with these alpha pitbull wannabes for the company of women is a good use of my time. The key word in Stratego is the "Strat" part which notes
strategy, and that is something I have learned, at the expense of a conventional social life and academic or career success. While my name will ring out in the Stratego community (don't bother searching for me, I will just tell you about all my achievements), I feel an empty pit in my stomach and sometimes wonder how my life would have turned out if I didn't bring the boardgame to all the hottest clubs in Gainesville and Orlando. Its tough to say, because girls don't often value acumen on a board, they are more interested in street cred. But thankfully, I once beat a guy over the head with a full Stratego box for stepping to and talking to this sweet little piece I was trying to mack on, and the fucking plastic parts went flying everywhere. A scout hit the bouncer in the eye, and he took me outside and was about to lay me out but I quickly told him my stepfather was a paralegal for Charles Binder (a renowned lawyer and legal expert) and he backed down. He let me back inside to gather my things, and as I was picking up my Stratego pieces, a beautiful woman made eye contact with me and smiled. She was an elderly woman who I had helped recently at the homeless shelter, but she knew how to pretty up at that club, I'll tell you that. There was something about her eyes. I took her home but because I had been drinking quite a bit that night I was unable to maintain an erection and she left unfucked and unsatisfied, but I called her the next day and apologized and she was quite cordial. She had plenty to be embarrassed about believe me. While I was unable to engage in traditional penetration, I fingered her quite hard and as she climaxed she defecated all over my mattress. Earlier I had massaged her perinium with a Seargent piece, which she was into. I didn't have a sheet on it either, so I had to go the mattress store the next day. I took out a line of credit to buy a Tempurpedic, which was miles better than the last one I had, and as I was in line, I talked to the cashier about good podcasts to listen to. He recommended Dan Carlin's Hardcore History. That is how I ended up finding about that forum, and when it closed down I ended up here. I sometimes tell people this story, because it is one of my favorites!
