ITTW Draft My Opening Comments for Local AM Show I Have Hotline For

[Fife]

On the bright side, your Obamaphone will get 5 bars in the middle of the Congo. You probably want to carry an extra charge pack or two though.

[Speaker to Animals]

With so much diversity and cultural enrichment, I doubt you will feel the need to waste your time playing around with a smartphone anyway.

[Fife]

Maybe for less advanced folk, but you'll want a full charge on yours for any updated hi-level programming.

There's a kulak hiding behind every chimpanzee you know.

[kybkh]

I will be talking about the fake news about the CovCath kids and comparing the coverage this non-event got compared to the attention the kidnapped white kid in Chicago.