Perfect Marriage

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MilSpecs
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Re: Perfect Marriage

Post by MilSpecs » Fri Nov 02, 2018 11:28 am

GloryofGreece wrote:
Fri Nov 02, 2018 10:37 am
We are not very rational overall. Only when we do a math problem are we really that precise and measured. Nor should we be in most instances. Emotions are part of being human and part of every single relationship. The question is, how much should romantic feeling factor into a marriage? The answer will vary based on your values.
Maybe romantic love is the push we need to get to get started on the path to “real” love.
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GloryofGreece
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Re: Perfect Marriage

Post by GloryofGreece » Fri Nov 02, 2018 11:33 am

Martin Hash wrote:
Fri Nov 02, 2018 10:41 am
GloryofGreece wrote:
Fri Nov 02, 2018 10:37 am
We are not very rational overall. Only when we do a math problem are we really that precise and measured. Nor should we be in most instances. Emotions are part of being human and part of every single relationship. The question is, how much should romantic feeling factor into a marriage? The answer will vary based on your values.
I separate a perfect marriage from the “love” component for just that reason.
Well maybe for you "perfect" is rationality/reasonableness and for another "perfect" is emotive, poetic, and heart throbbing and so on.

I know you prefer a hell of order to a hell of chaos.
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C-Mag
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Re: Perfect Marriage

Post by C-Mag » Fri Nov 02, 2018 3:30 pm

Every perfect marriage needs a canon too, don't forget that.
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Martin Hash
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Re: Perfect Marriage

Post by Martin Hash » Fri Nov 02, 2018 4:48 pm

MilSpecs wrote:
Fri Nov 02, 2018 11:28 am
GloryofGreece wrote:
Fri Nov 02, 2018 10:37 am
We are not very rational overall. Only when we do a math problem are we really that precise and measured. Nor should we be in most instances. Emotions are part of being human and part of every single relationship. The question is, how much should romantic feeling factor into a marriage? The answer will vary based on your values.
Maybe romantic love is the push we need to get to get started on the path to “real” love.
Considering how romantic love works, it's got to be genetic, so it must improve the propagation of the species in some way. I speculate that it's not a coincidence that young people feel romantic love at its most powerful when women are most biologically successful at reproduction.
Shamedia, Shamdemic, Shamucation, Shamlection, Shamconomy & Shamate Change

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Martin Hash
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Re: Perfect Marriage

Post by Martin Hash » Fri Nov 02, 2018 4:52 pm

GloryofGreece wrote:
Fri Nov 02, 2018 11:33 am
Martin Hash wrote:
Fri Nov 02, 2018 10:41 am
GloryofGreece wrote:
Fri Nov 02, 2018 10:37 am
We are not very rational overall. Only when we do a math problem are we really that precise and measured. Nor should we be in most instances. Emotions are part of being human and part of every single relationship. The question is, how much should romantic feeling factor into a marriage? The answer will vary based on your values.
I separate a perfect marriage from the “love” component for just that reason.
Well maybe for you "perfect" is rationality/reasonableness and for another "perfect" is emotive, poetic, and heart throbbing and so on.

I know you prefer a hell of order to a hell of chaos.
I've tried to determine what mix of brain chemistry produces love because there is no "love" molecule, only one for lust. I'm thinking the comfort aspect (serotonin) is one, and envy, but not in the negative sense; envy + perversity = bad, but envy by itself is the source of admiration. Affection is probably comfort + envy.
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Martin Hash
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Re: Perfect Marriage

Post by Martin Hash » Fri Nov 02, 2018 4:54 pm

C-Mag wrote:
Fri Nov 02, 2018 3:30 pm
Every perfect marriage needs a canon too, don't forget that.
A perfect marriage probably has indicators that are visible from the outside. The common recognition of the ridiculousness of a canon, and the shared humor it brings, is indicative of something good.
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MilSpecs
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Re: Perfect Marriage

Post by MilSpecs » Fri Nov 02, 2018 6:35 pm

Martin Hash wrote:
Fri Nov 02, 2018 4:48 pm
MilSpecs wrote:
Fri Nov 02, 2018 11:28 am
GloryofGreece wrote:
Fri Nov 02, 2018 10:37 am
We are not very rational overall. Only when we do a math problem are we really that precise and measured. Nor should we be in most instances. Emotions are part of being human and part of every single relationship. The question is, how much should romantic feeling factor into a marriage? The answer will vary based on your values.
Maybe romantic love is the push we need to get to get started on the path to “real” love.
Considering how romantic love works, it's got to be genetic, so it must improve the propagation of the species in some way. I speculate that it's not a coincidence that young people feel romantic love at its most powerful when women are most biologically successful at reproduction.
How would you explain it for men? They don't have reproductive time constraints but still feel romantic love most powerfully when young.
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Martin Hash
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Re: Perfect Marriage

Post by Martin Hash » Fri Nov 02, 2018 6:41 pm

MilSpecs wrote:
Fri Nov 02, 2018 6:35 pm
Martin Hash wrote:
Fri Nov 02, 2018 4:48 pm
MilSpecs wrote:
Fri Nov 02, 2018 11:28 am


Maybe romantic love is the push we need to get to get started on the path to “real” love.
Considering how romantic love works, it's got to be genetic, so it must improve the propagation of the species in some way. I speculate that it's not a coincidence that young people feel romantic love at its most powerful when women are most biologically successful at reproduction.
How would you explain it for men? They don't have reproductive time constraints but still feel romantic love most powerfully when young.
Now I’m just spitballing, but men are maximally hormone driven at about age 18, and they’re has-beens by 30. I’d say an 18 - 15 pairing has been common in history, though the numbers are not as great given modern schooling practices of grouping by age.
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MilSpecs
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Re: Perfect Marriage

Post by MilSpecs » Fri Nov 02, 2018 8:03 pm

Martin Hash wrote:
Fri Nov 02, 2018 6:41 pm
MilSpecs wrote:
Fri Nov 02, 2018 6:35 pm
Martin Hash wrote:
Fri Nov 02, 2018 4:48 pm

Considering how romantic love works, it's got to be genetic, so it must improve the propagation of the species in some way. I speculate that it's not a coincidence that young people feel romantic love at its most powerful when women are most biologically successful at reproduction.
How would you explain it for men? They don't have reproductive time constraints but still feel romantic love most powerfully when young.
Now I’m just spitballing, but men are maximally hormone driven at about age 18, and they’re has-beens by 30. I’d say an 18 - 15 pairing has been common in history, though the numbers are not as great given modern schooling practices of grouping by age.
From a woman's POV, men seem pretty steadily hormone driven way past 30. Maybe not every second of the day anymore, but still a lot. If they have no reproductive time constraints then it makes sense.
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Martin Hash
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Re: Perfect Marriage

Post by Martin Hash » Fri Nov 02, 2018 10:13 pm

???

A sperm bank won’t take from a 50-yo man. Poor sperm motility, and there are indications that children from older fathers have lower IQs.

History didn’t have a lot of room for wusses. A 40-yo man is at an extreme disadvantage siring children unless they are king.
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