Home Decorating

User avatar
Martin Hash
Posts: 9949
Joined: Wed Jan 20, 2010 2:02 pm

Home Decorating

Post by Martin Hash » Tue Dec 04, 2018 10:12 am

When people see our house from the outside, they’re not sure what to make of it. It seems elegant but understated with a hint of eccentricity. Most probably can’t wait to get inside and sate their curiosity, and we don’t disappoint but those who think that dark wood, detailed trim, and extravagant furnishings are the epitome of high fashion, are going to need a double-take. For example, when status-conscious neighbors come by to visit my wife, Gwynne, for the first time, they always work into the conversation that they would love to help.
“Who decorated you home?”
“My husband.”
“Where does he get his ideas.”
“He’s inspired.”
“Oh,” they say. “I can see that...”

The first thing you notice about our decorating skills is the 8’ plastic T-Rex skeleton, name Hugh, in the foyer. On holidays it’s holding an Easter basket or wearing a Santa hat.
T-Rex Skeleton.jpg

Moving on, our visitor will certainly be impressed with my favorite “Action” comic books adorning the walls, all with fabulous covers and backstories: “Slap a Jap,” is printed on the cover of one of the war issues. There’s also famous newspapers: Kennedy assassination, moon landing, Nixon resignation, Twin Towers. I'm proud of my coin collections, stamp collections, fossils & record albums, all hanging on the walls. There’s statues in all the nooks & crannies: Mark Twain, butler, maid, wooden Indian, rocking horse, soldier, and there's room for more.
Stamp Collection.jpg

There’s the circular fish tank coffee table, and the white couch Gwynne hates but it’s gotten so much use the leather is wearing through. There’s a battery-powered elephant that that you can ride, and an old Philco Princess TV that I got working for Obama's inauguration. I always spend time explaining the animal art collection actually painted by gorillas, elephants & tigers.
Fish Tank & TV.jpg

I told Gwynne that I’m thinking my next career may be as an interior decorator.
“Hmmm,” she said. “You may want to rethink that if you intend to make any money.”
“That's funny coming from a woman with over a 100 penguins.”

Gwynne is holding the line at putting a moose head in the Guest room over the headboard.
You do not have the required permissions to view the files attached to this post.

Posts: 7565
Joined: Thu Mar 16, 2017 7:54 pm

Re: Home Decorating

Post by heydaralon » Tue Dec 04, 2018 6:07 pm

Good shit. Fuck your stick up the ass neighbor telling you how you should decorate your own house. I like the Indian and Twain statue.
Shikata ga nai

User avatar
Posts: 1852
Joined: Thu Dec 01, 2016 1:13 pm
Location: Deep in the heart of Jersey

Re: Home Decorating

Post by MilSpecs » Tue Dec 04, 2018 6:31 pm

Modern eclectic. Love it. Really love Hugh!