Guilting Tuesday

[Martin Hash]

Begging has gotten to be a huge problem. Back when I was a kid, the church would occasionally come around, and I'd buy magazines and popcorn from the neighborhood kids for Little League. Plus, I could sponsor my wife's Girl Scouts, and my nephew's 4H bulls; no problem, but sometime in the last decade, folks hitting me up for money at every opportunity has really gotten out of hand. I had been blaming it on my entry into politics; lots of donations there; I probably got on a mailing list somewhere. It got so bad, I stopped answering my phone because people would exploit my phone courtesy to ask for things, over and over and over, especially during election season and holidays

However, it's even worse now; over the past year on Facebook I've noticed that rather than just notifying you of one of your Friend's birthdays, there's now a message beseeching you to give to their preferred charity. “For my birthday I want you to donate to my charity.”
Somebody can’t just have a Well Wishes birthday, now they use the opportunity to guilt money out of you.
“That will teach me not to be courteous again,” I said to myself, and forgot it, ignoring the 100s of requests that have come since. Then today, right in the middle of my Facebook newsfeed, was a vivacious animated graphic, just screaming “Martin, It's Giving Tuesday so give money!”

Facebook.JPG

It’s not bad enough that Facebook sells my data for money, Facebook itself uses my personal information to guilt and shame me, and you know they keep track whether or not you're a heartless miser. Not only was Facebook going at me hard, my email was loaded.

Dear Martin,
Since we founded Help the Kelp, one of our goals has always been to use our business as a vehicle to improve the environment. That's why this #GivingTuesday we're trying to bring dollars and doers together to accelerate environmental giving.

Dear Martin,
Today we are celebrating the power of giving.
OHSU and Doernbecher Children’s Hospital provide world-changing science, revolutionary breakthroughs and leading-edge care. And supporters like you make it all possible.
Please make a gift today on Giving Tuesday. Your generosity not only helps to shape modern science, but the entire landscape of health and wellness.

Lewis & Clark.JPG

And on and on...

What was going on, I had to know, so I Googled “Giving Tuesday” and the Wiki page said it all:

Giving Tuesday, refers to the Tuesday after U.S. Thanksgiving in the United States. It is a movement to create an international day of charitable giving at the beginning of the Christmas and holiday season. Giving Tuesday was started in 2012 by the United Nations Foundation as a response to commercialization and consumerism in the post-Thanksgiving season.

It's a frickin' begging holiday. Santas incessantly ringing the damn bell at Walmart all month ain't enough, now you've got to be inundated from every avenue of contact. My home phone was ringing from 5 am and 11 pm, continuously.

I was telling my son, Heath, about how tired I was of being exploited. “I would never give money to a charity for somebody's birthday,” I said, categorically.
Heath's face showed surprise. “What are you talking about, you just gave Jason's birthday Facebook charity $100.”
“But he came over to the house and said nobody was giving him any money,” I replied. “I felt guilty for letting him down.”
Heath looked at me: “Yeah, what was it you were saying?”
“Hey, I'm a good guy; Facebook knows I gave him money.”

[MilSpecs]

"Help the Kelp"

The Gofundmes are starting to piss me off. If it's someone I know, or a friend asking on behalf of someone they know, I feel like I have to give even though I'd rather give to a charity. Often it's someone who may not even really need the money but someone else just felt like they wanted to do something.

[C-Mag]

I'm going to start a Go Fund Me to seek help in curing my White Patriarchy Affliction.

Please Help me

[TheReal_ND]

I need a ladder rack.