I'm running for the U.S. House, WA3. There's a gaggle of other candidates; I have no illusions of winning, but it's incredibly entertaining, and I'll be doing it again in 2 years. One of the first things you learn about elections is that voters don't know anything: they don't know what district they live in, they don't know the candidates, and they certainly don't know their own ideology. But now, with the help of the Internet, you can answer a raft of obtuse questions and, voila, your ideology is revealed to you. I know, I've used these websites myself so I could tell voters what I think. Confident after my hours of testing, I asked the other candidates about their ideologies, but they didn't know either, so I hooked them up to these links:
Political Left Right Test
Political Compass
8 Values Political Test
Knowing your ideology is very reassuring; for example, you can be Left or Right, or Up or Down (I'm never quite sure what the up or down thingies are?) Me, I'm in the center, which didn't actually help that much because whenever somebody asks if I'm Up or Down, I have to kind of wiggle my thumb and hope they can't tell I'm waffling. There's also the “Kill Babies” and “Don't Kill Babies” ideology but I stay away from that one, and there's the “Gun” ideology but I don't own a gun; I do have a cowboy hat, does that help?
The ideologies I like best have bar graphs. You answer a couple more questions, and the result comes out in color. That's better, right, a colorful ideology? I like Blue a lot, but Red too, and don't make me pick between Orange and Purple. Unfortunately, my favorite color is an off-chartreuse, and there's no corresponding ideology, so that's out.
I showed my wife, Gwynne, my bar chart ideology, and she told me that was a political test, not an ideology test. I complained because I just learned how to spell “ideology” without using a checker, and now it seems kind of a waste; I already knew how to spell “political.”
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