Shopping At Walmart

[Martin Hash]

I admit it, I'm a Walmart shopper. I never used to shop at Walmart but Kmart went broke, probably because of Walmart. From first impressions, I'd say Walmart actually has employees who give a shit compared to Kmart because they speak English. It's also a comforting feeling knowing that whatever you buy at Walmart, you can't buy anywhere else cheaper. I always say, you can never have enough Chinese-made goods. And Returns? Anytime, any reason. And the fashion? It's perfect if, like myself, you have absolutely no care about the label. However, having the personality to shop at Walmart is a two-edged sword: all the other people who shop at Walmart also don't give a rat's ass about who thinks they're cool either, and that can be a bad thing for people without any self-awareness.

Walmart Camper Parking.jpg

Walmart shoppers are the people who can't shop anywhere that requires appropriate clothes. I know because they're all so comfortably dressed in sweats to better air their contagious skin conditions. And some of them even travel between Walmart parking lots in their old motor-homes because Walmart allows that kind of thing. In fact, my wife, Gwynne & I, found a map on the Internet that shows all the Walmart parking lots you can stay overnight in for when we start traveling around the U.S. Even better, we go to McDonald's every morning, and many Walmarts have a McDonald's built right in. How cool is that? After seeing the size of people who shop at Walmart, they ought to just buyout McDonald's, it's the same customers. However, I do sometimes think, hey, you might want to go easy on those Big Macs, because, you know, I care about people.

People of Walmart 2.JPG

Gwynne was very apprehensive when we first started shopping at Walmart because her favorite website is “People of Walmart,” and she definitely did NOT want to meet any of THOSE people. She told me if she saw even one person wearing a colostomy bag while in shorts, she was going to bolt for the door, leaving her basket behind. I assured her that if I saw even one person in a tank top who had “back boobs,” I was going to be right behind her. And, another thing I've learned about Walmart, when you hear your name announced over the loudspeaker, it means somebody called the cops on you.

walmart-parking-lot.jpg

[TheReal_ND]

FUN FACT

WALMART PARKING LOTS ARE THE ONLY ONE WITH SHADE TREE PARKING SPACES

LITERALLY NO OTHER STORE IN MY TOWN DOES THAT

NOT A SINGLE OTHER FUCKING ONE. AND IM NOT JUST TALKING ABOUT ONE WALMART I MEAN ALL THREE OF THEM (SOON FOUR!!!)

[doc_loliday]

I used to piss on Walmart. I just don't care anymore. Save mart doesn't have robot checkers and the 2 people checkers they have are old and surly. They have long lines and I ain't got time for that.

And now I understand they have shade trees for guys like ND so there's another plus.

I do think its messed up that they post their stock prices in the employee areas. Just gotta rub it in I guess.

[Fife]

The Real Joe Dirt is a fan:

[Speaker to Animals]

Walmart is a spiritual catastrophe. If Jesus came in our time, he'd probably be at Walmart trying to save the obeasts from spiritual destruction (before the cops arrested him).

[Ex-California]

We're bougey, we go to Target

[Speaker to Animals]

We're bougey, we go to Target

Don't let your kids use the restroom there. Target became a target for pedos and trannies a few years back.

[Ex-California]

We're bougey, we go to Target

Don't let your kids use the restroom there. Target became a target for pedos and trannies a few years back.

I go with them, they're too young to go into bathrooms by themselves.

Especially in this state

[Hanarchy Montanarchy]

Walmart is a spiritual catastrophe. If Jesus came in our time, he'd probably be at Walmart trying to save the obeasts from spiritual destruction (before the cops arrested him).

That would make a very good short story.

[TheReal_ND]

Send halp please. I only just talked myself out of going downtown. Please god. Please I don't want to be homeless